Sunday, June 10, 2012

Caress




moonlight
come and make me glow in white.

sunlight,
make me blush in red.

dusk,
caress me in crimson and yellow.

dawn, kiss me in shades of blue, and green.
make me alive.

make me radiant
for I too am an object
of your colors.

I inhibit,I absorb.

I, LOVE.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Sadhu and God


There was a sadhu lying naked outside the zoo.


The spirit of holy Sachal Sirmed revived.
No passer-by blessed  him standing in the middle of the Mall r
Surrounded by  banks, boutiques and best eateries.
It was too lavish to bear a naked man;
And people gathered around, hoping it was a daring Chelsea  football fan
In support of his team  miles apart across the other continent

“Err…what is soccer FIFA League?
“Ah yes, we too have a FIFA league---somewhat playing in Pak”

Big deal.

The man, nonetheless, is standing naked.
He’s not waiting for a lover;
But some said he must be at mental asylum

“no wait, this man is not mad. He just  has a sachet of cocaine found next him”

Said the officer.

:"But officer,, please hurry, my young children are looking at him---all naked”

The old man was lying indeed, perhaps sleeping in oblivion.

A mystic, found to be sleeping in dreams; but creating a ruckus in his civilized world
Not able to understand

“what is closer to God”

They asked

“morality!” came the answer.


The old man finally overheard.

“nay it is the love of god. And it is for this you are calling me immoral”
“but the clothes, where are they”
“I am a reborn.  Why can’t god accept my nudity”
‘Astaghfirullah” came the reply
“god knows everything about me.  What is there to hide.  If man is primarily naked, then why are we covering it up.  Hasn’t god seen a naked human before”
“blasphemy”

“how so, what is wrong with it.  If god finds my nudity objectionable then why can’t we call perversion and a hypocrisy as his attributes—or is it just relevant to humans?”

“humans”

“but are god’s 99 attributes are almost relevant to human creed.  Tell me have we created god?’

‘they are not supposed to be like that”

“like anger and the humiliating others out of many?”

“yes, so”

“Then how can he endorse such humanly attributes for himself if he is a god?”

“let me draw out the dragger and a close range shooting gun”

“Very well.  That’s lack of argument on god’s behalf…l  however, did not mention one attribute that no god can take away from a human”

“such as?”

“the sense of pain, loss, bereavement…has god ever cried as a human”

“What nonsense---God is god”

“well, I am all exposed on my free will, because I abhor everything artificial, except for god whom I also suspect as a non- natural.  I am more mystical, while you are hard as his regulation followers.  I have felt pain, perhaps not even god.  Tell me if he has ever shed tears like we do, would he have the honor of join us our food and ask for our forgiveness, like humans do , for all the injustice he has committed in his name?
“ridiculous suggestion.  God will never  sit down with people like you”

Very well then, tell him we are happy without him.  If he really is is concerned, tell him to be a human forst and them decide what misery he has put us in”

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Godless girls: Rasputin; a little bit of you in me.

Godless girls: Rasputin; a little bit of you in me.: Rasputin, your dark character engulfs me in awe; more I despise you, more I feel the need for you. This is divine seduction with treacherou...

Rasputin; a little bit of you in me.


Rasputin, your dark character engulfs me in awe; more I despise you, more I feel the need for you. This is divine seduction with treacherous anticipation of a reward, but it was only through pain of your punishment I sought bliss.

I never knew how I keep a little bit of you in me.

Your sheer honesty in the mockery you made against me as your devotee; or should I call it your hypocrisy for you knew your creed well in spite of every truth that you knew were lies. I could not distinguish what was real and what were illusions. It was maddening love I've had for you once, and will take it to my grave despite all my denial of accepting your presence. I seek an escape, but I feel too limited, shallow and helpless. You are that poison that's eating away my soul, and my conscience. You have made me rigid and conditional in my existence.

Yet,

I never knew how I keep a little bit of you in me.

despite everything.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Divergent Colors




in the colors I see your image;
Ya Musaviro! the unconventional protagonist
that I want you to be
of the story you started for us.

I don't have you in control though
while others splash their crimson blood,

I seek a red tilak for love, a pinch of blue from the sky
and a little silver from the moon
to define me.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Holi: Our celebration of colors


I am not an infidel, nor must I be labelled as one. My love for colors is not my crime. My crime is my indolence as a spectator of undue treatment that even I could nakedly feel while belonging to the mainstream religious Muslim community. Regardless of what beheld many intrigued minds--the festival was beautiful. To those following Hindu religion, it is a ritual of festivity and co-existence, bringing all class and creed together. To me, it was not merely my curiosity, but also my intent to fill in the void that has been systematically created in me about my own fellow non-Muslim citizens. That was the night when I allowed the void to be filled with colors, and I am glad I allowed it.

But at the entrance of the Temple in old Lahore, the security guard wouldn’t let me in after seeing my National Identification Card.

“You can’t go in”
“Why not?”
“ Because you are a Muslim”

Does it mean I lead a dull life?

Aware of my land’s history only through textbooks based on the ideology bred on the narration of exclusivity, stench of bigoted notions towards non-Muslims, and in particular towards Hindus heavily propagandized as enemies of Islam in the region—there is not a trace to be found through Social Studies textbooks that Hindus are our fellow citizens too. Nor is there any mention in the Pakistan Studies how in the world has more than 70% of Hindu population disappeared since the time of its inception? The low numbers show a shameful trait; much to the “boast” of the militant mullah who consider it their victory over an already weakened segment of society. Every other day am I to receive a text message demeaning Hindus for their faith; declaring them enemies of Pakistan and justify not just verbal abuse, but murderous rant against them as well. There are reports of forced conversions of Hindu girls to Islam who have been raped and then married off to their very perpetrators. There is never a mainstream news about how their property and businesses are taken over. As the media keeps decrying America/Jewish/Hindu domination based on unfounded speculation implanted here for justifying enormous defense budget by demonizing India, no one is willing to point out the harms of marginalizing own communities within Pakistan by the very state that remains benign in its efforts to pay heed to their plight. We are a damaged nation, and it does no one any good if more hate and bigotry is used as balm to heal our wounds; nay, it will only make us more sick.

I refuse to remain sick. The prejudice had to be removed, and the first realization came when I too had suffered degradation for my religion when I briefly left for abroad for further studies. Though the sort of prejudice I faced was nothing compared to discrimination I witness here at both societal and state level, the sense of relationship and relativity to suffering is perhaps most important to understand in order to know what grave humiliation means to an individual and his/her community they ascribe to. My brief interaction took place with a lively young lady, Pinky, whose smile told a story of herself. The joy and an obvious hint of curiosity at the presence of an outsider at the temple where she met me. She said all treated her fairly, though there was no Mandir to visit in her home town about 60 KM from lahore. A little more introspection reveals a grimmer picture; according to a rough estimate, there are only 26 temples functional out of a mere total of 428 in Pakistan, the rest of them are in ruins. Yet Pinky never indicated nervousness in her smile as she splashed a pinch of yellow on me.

A little more close look and more suspicion arose. The temple was filled with media men, and at one point, the TV crew appeared to be more in numbers than the actual Holi participants. It made one wonder whether all of them were really required to film this occasion, knowing that the widespread incidents against minorities hardly get any coverage. Though the whole sequence made it look like a happy affair on screen, whereas, their very presence seemed to have taken away the natural gaiety of Holi. How awfully balanced the mainstream media would be if only it could also focus on the number of gruesome violence leveled against this community as well. But this doesn’t seem to be the case here. With genuine exception of my friends and those trying to reach out and struggle for their rights, the whole media coverage was suddenly concerned about creating a “soft image” of Pakistan, yet at the same time subtly debasing the Hindu community for raising their voice over a Hindu girl’s alleged forced conversion to Islam.

The very essence of respect and dignity seems to be the privilege only for those who follow the specific brand of a misinterpreted Islam. Every day we are faced with the dilemma of what to be considered acceptable and what is to be discarded, bringing us to stark irony of how marginalization of our own citizens can collectively harm us all economically, socially and morally. Progressiveness is determined through inclusiveness, not exclusiveness, and it is a shame how vigilantism stands stronger than already discriminatory laws of the land that have designated only second class status to our religious minorities. Constitutionally, our minorities can become easy victims of violence and subject to “blasphemy laws” which further push them into extra cautiousness and intimidation, because any untoward thing dared uttered can easily get them framed at the slightest hunch. Perhaps the reason why Pinky couldn’t open much.

We can’t form judgments unless we feel ourselves in their pain . It is high time we realized the pain we have been inflicting on ourselves, let go of our inhibitions and explore who we are. We can’t allow colors to be snatched from us, we can’t remain regressive. We have to appreciate our beauty within, for it is only through colors around us are we able to see God. Consider that as an appeal from one individual to fellow citizens. Thank you.


in the colors I see your image;
Ya Musaviro--the unconventional protagonist
that I want you to be
of the story you started for us.

I don't have you in control though
while others splash their crimson blood
I seek a red tilak for love, a pinch of blue from the sky
and a little silver from the moon.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Elements of Fire

heat, smoke and a burning soul;

rage and ashes;

A moment of conclusion

is a fading line

between the existing and the non-existing

(song by Vast,)
Zeeba T. Hashmi